What will I do to feel the way I want to feel?
I rarely give up weeknights for anything. I’m downright stingy with them. I hoard weeknight hours. I protect them. I don’t give them away. They are sacred wells of wellness. I don’t poison the wells with busy-ness. This is when I get repaired. I get re-aligned. Adjusted. It is regular maintenance that only works when I keep it regular. It’s a practice.
But why do we practice? So that we are ready when the Universe sends us opportunities to operate, right? What good is being aligned if we never use the gifts we align? I will share weeknights when someone will benefit more from my company than I would benefit from solitude. When someone needs me or just wants me to be near; to listen, to offer perspective, to hold space, to share space. The times when the closeness of my heart would lift the heart of another. On those nights I get in my car and drive to another city. I stay up past my bedtime. I give of my time and my energy. I sacrifice my plans and agenda and make someone else the center of my attention. It makes me feel Generous. It transforms Me Time into We Time. In the dark parking lot, preparing to drive home, grateful for the opportunity to give.
I will choose a mental health day. I will claim it, free of guilt. Most importantly, I will use it for mental health. I will press pause on the daily grind. I will conjure up a personal holiday for psychological respite. It makes me feel Empowered to celebrate the luxury of time earned in my own service.
As many times per week as I can managed them I will insist on a slow morning. Time to just be where I am without fussing over what comes next. As my friend Holly says, to be where my feet are. It’s more than a mindful moment. It’s an entire mindful morning. It makes me feel nurtured.
I will prioritize yoga because middle life aches for the ease of youth. If I want to feel supple in my strength I will make time for it. I will make space for it. I will make sure the vagaries of the average day do not rob me of my chance to maintain it, be an hour or another 40 minutes consecrated on my mat.
I will wear out my running shoes. Specifically, I will let them go when they reach retirement age. This sounds easy but quality running shoes are not cheap. Hell, let’s be honest–they are expensive. A girl on a budget who likes her stretch her investment dollars as far as possible can often be guilty of hanging on too long. This is the equivalent of flirting with an injury. Who wants to feel injured? Who wants to feel desperate and needy? Who wants to feel responsible for compromising her own wellness? I want to feel strong. I want to feel splendid. I will make sacrifices to stay on the road, and I will celebrate with a goodbye selfie to these road warriors.
I will make my own Magic. I will be the Magic. I will share the Magic. I will manifest the Magic. I will highlight it in low light and I will enjoy the occasion of feeling magical.
It’s all about the why.