The Nope Files–Don’t Be

Here’s another one for the Nope Files, found on Pinterest:


Sounds good, doesn’t it? Sounds reasonable, right? Sounds inspirational, no?

It’s not. It’s pressure to change into someone else. It’s a subtle way of telling you to be someone other than This Girl. Don’t be you; be That Girl. The language is important here, because using the term That Girl over and over conjures up a comparison to someone who isn’t you. Even if That Girl is fictional or an idealized person you’d like to be, it sends a strong message to your self that the girl you are isn’t good enough. You aren’t counseled to wake up with purpose and intent. You’re told to become a person (a person you are not) who does those things. It is subtle but powerful, and by that I mean powerfully damaging.

If you feel compelled to change, then change. But don’t assume it is necessary to transform out of who you are and into someone new/better/whatever. Take out the instruction to be some other girl and read it again:

Wake up with purpose and intent.

Show up and never give up.

Believe anything is possible.

Be willing to work for it.

The difference here is that you still get to be you. YOU get to do these things without changing yourself into someone else or assuming you must be a different person in order to achieve them. And don’t try telling me that I’m reading too much into this. This image has been re-pinned over 34,000 times. That’s 34,000 people who have internalized the suggestion that This Girl needs to change into That Girl.


— Mercy

One Comment Add yours

  1. SDC says:

    Pinterest and facebook are choking with these shallow, meaningless profundities. If someone repins or shares it, it makes them feel like they’ve said something or absorbed something. When in reality, they’ve done nothing to make any changes. Just clicked a button. I always warn my daughter to consider what she’s sharing on instagram. Consider if it actually has ANY MEANING at all, or what it actually says before she allows it to be representative of her!


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