TMI, Fake, Etc. — Three Ways Stay Broke

Occupational and financial wellness is not a lottery, folks. Help me help you. Job seekers, success chasers, and rewards reapers; let’s add a few more items to the list of things that are probably killing your employment chances.

Don’t blurt out your sexual orientation during the interview. Just don’t. If you reveal your sexual orientation during the interview you probably aren’t going to get hired because hiring managers have zero good choices once they are responsible for the information. You can’t be hired because you ARE gay and you can’t be hired because you are NOT gay. Either hire based on sexual orientation is discrimination against other orientations. The hiring manager can basically do nothing with the information without the risk of being sued by someone. If you put a hiring manager in this position before you’re even employed, he or she is probably going find a reason to opt for another candidate.

Yes, it really happens. I interviewed a candidate last week who listened to me lead up to my next question but then impatiently interrupted me with a vehement, “I am not gay!” Good gravy, not only was I NOT going ask this, I DON’T want to know this. Just like age, origin, race, or religion, this is not a qualifier. These are also not dis-qualifiers. It is inappropriate for this information to be discussed in relation to your employment because it is not information I can use in any way related to your employment.

Folks, whether you are gay or straight, be proud of who you are and who you love but do not put a hiring manager in this position. Employers can’t ask about your sexual orientation because they can’t discriminate on the basis of your sexual orientation. To put it bluntly, being gay or straight can’t help your chances or hurt your chances unless someone is already breaking the law. It’s supposed to be a non-issue, irrelevant, and if suspected, disregarded. Employers need to NOT know in order to give you a fair shake.

Unless you’re Yul Brynner

Don’t use “etc.” on your resume for any reason, ever. I read one of these glorious resumes today. The candidate summarized his former positions  by providing one underwhelming sentence and then used “etc.” where he should have explained his responsibilities and accomplishments.

The resume lands the interview. The interview lands the job. Employers aren’t likely to consider a candidate who can’t be troubled with the minimum expectation of a detailed work history.

Using “etc.” screams to anyone reading your resume I don’t have time for this or I don’t want to be bothered with this.  It implies that you will cut corners or leave out pertinent information on the job to save yourself time or hassle. This is a massive red flag, especially when applying for a job which requires documentation or reporting. Either spell it out or leave it blank but don’t use “etc.”

Being a liar is worse than being inexperienced. Do not create a fictitious employer with a fictitious address to fake some job experience. I caught a candidate doing it this week and I’m honestly stunned that he thought anyone would be stupid enough to fall for this. I guess there is still a certain segment of the population which believes no one will check. The business didn’t exist. The address doesn’t exist. The fake references were dead people with disconnected phone numbers. He went so far as to get his best friend on the phone to pose as a former boss. They didn’t think it through. The fake former boss only made it worse. The employment allegedly ended last month but the fake boss didn’t know enough fake details about the fake business to make any part of it sound credible. My friends, this will prohibit your hire 100% of the time unless you’re trying to land a job as a fraud.

You may scoff that I am only one person, in one office, in one business. That’s true, but I will never hire a liar. I will never hire anyone too lazy to explain work history. I will never hire someone because they think being straight or gay is a qualification. Multiply this times 30 million employers in the United States. Then consider that on the off chance you do get lucky with one of these tactics you’d probably be working with a bunch of similarly employed liars, bigots, and lazy shitbirds, or worse, working for one.

— Mercy

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s