Anything. Just Write Something.

I’m still here! Almost two weeks since I posted but all is well. My time management has shifted into a vortex of puppy maintenance (with very early hours), tennis championships (hard to fall sleep after late matches), an uptick in family obligations, and a random slew of unplanned coworker absences. All of which require extra rest (which I am not getting).

By family obligations I probably mean family opportunities. COVID life has made The Chef’s adult children lonely. They want to come over and eat, stay, play, etc. and I won’t say no. The Grandcub has now aged a year and a half; walking, talking, throwing, breaking, swimming, barfing, blowing out diapers, and rolling around on the ground with the dogs. It is messy mayhem. Even though I’m home I’m grinding out support, participation, food service, and janitorial duties on less sleep than I prefer. The bonding is worth it, of course.

But all of this is groggy slogging is temporary. COVID restrictions will change and then the nest will naturally empty again as other venues become more exciting than my house. The puppy will fill out and become too big to fit through the fence, ending the necessity for 4:30 am wakings and constant supervision at all other times. The state tennis championships will wrap up this weekend. The league I captain will finish up in October. Work will gear down for the slow season. I will look back on the cranky COVID chaos with rested eyes, a clear head, and blog to my heart’s content. Just wait. You’ll see.

I stole these moments to get something posted in between matches. I think I mentioned that my Spring tennis team made it to the state championship tournament. The COVID shutdown and slow-down and catch-up pushed the tournament to September so we are just now getting around to it. Up at 4:30 am with dogs and worked all day. I drove straight from work to last night’s match, had a snack, warm-ups, won the match in a tiebreaker, drove home, gobbled down dinner, and sat wide awake past bedtime too amped up to sleep. Up again before dawn with the dogs, more matches today, and the finals tomorrow. All of that to say I should be taking a nap right now but I’m updating my blog instead.

But I need this too – the ritual of writing, even if it is only this and about nothing which couldn’t wait. It is I who couldn’t wait. Two weeks is just too long not to feel the flow of words, no matter how ordinary they are. A million years ago on another blog I called it maintenance writing. The ritual endures as long as the need.

Eleventy-hundred other things need my attention right now but right now this is what my attention needs. The tick-tack of the keyboard beneath me and the wellness battery recharging within me. I’ll be tired regardless but I can make it a happy tired by allowing myself this pause for the soul. That’s my weary attempt at giving you a takeaway, in case you missed it. Which kind of tired will we be? Grateful tired? Happy tired? Fulfilled and tired? Or just tired? I mean, if we are going to be tired anyway, let’s get intentional about it. Purposeful with it. Or not. You choose.

Later this evening the dusty floors and unfolded laundry might try to shame me regarding my choice but they may not realize they are dealing with someone who managed to write 500 words today. These 500 words may be tomorrow’s catalyst to get the monthly highlight reel started now that the month is nearly half over. Time well spent. Practicing. Cultivating. Rejuvenating. Investing. Beats the shit out of complaining.

Be well, friends.

— Mercy

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